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  1. #1
    AvengerRam's Avatar
    AvengerRam is offline Moderator Emeritus
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    AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Ladies and gentlemen... a tribute to...

    Me!!!!!!!!!!!

    Let's take a look back, shall we, at some of my "Greatest Hits" over the span of 4,000 posts.

    Remember this, my first ClanRam poll:

    View Poll Results: When Did Kurt "Jump the Shark"?

    When he threw the first interception against the Pats in the Super Bowl.

    When he said, "sure Brenda, I think it would be a great if you did talk radio

    When made the "criticized for reading the Bible" comment.

    When he did the Chuncky Soup commercials.

    When cheated on Rachel while they were "on a break"...oh, wait.. that was "Friends."

    When, feeling playful after a win in New Orleans, he did his Mike Martz impression, only to be caught by the unamused coach.
    Not surprising that people thought I was anti-Warner with that one, huh?

    What about that great campaign for the inagural Clannie award for funniest poster. Remember this gem from ultimate winner Bob L. Head?

    Funniest Clannie Photo Exposed as Hoax


    ST. LOUIS - In a stunning reversal of fortune for the AvengerRam campaign, CIA photograph expert Jimmy "Snapshot" Shutterbug announced that the images presented by the campaign allegedly showing Bob L. Head and adarian_too in Whiner garb were in fact doctored. When studied, it was found that AvengerRam himself was behind the photo, but his image was erased using a high tech digital machine known as a "computer."

    http://www.dovertech.com/images/arlrg.jpg

    "It was just so unbelievable," Shutterbug stated when asked his reaction to the finding. "Never have I seen this sort of forgery used to win a Clannie."

    In a digitally enhanced version of the photo the image of AvengerRam can be clearly seen in the hallway behind the boys - if that's what they are. A blow up of the photo displays the unmistakble face of the candidate whose innocuous style and heartwarming fantasy stories have won the hearts of voters.

    http://www.dovertech.com/images/ardig.jpg

    Bob L. Head, in an unusual lack of congeniality said, "What else would you expect from a candidate who spends his time wallowing in the elephant pen? The people deserve more than his brand of low-brow humor. A vote for adarian and me will bring a fun, family, Brady Bunch style of comedy back to the ClanRam."

    AvengerRam was unavailable for comment. A spokesman for the AvengerRam campaign released this statement: "I have never had relations with that woman - Ms. Lewinsky."


    And, who can forget this, my first installment of "Fun with Wiretapping":

    My team of surveillance experts have been hard at work tapping the phones of various Rams players, coaches and agents. Here's a transcript of some of the more interesting conversations they have intercepted:

    Orlando Pace/Carl Poston

    Orlando: "Hello?"

    Carl: "Orlando, my friend. How are you doing?"

    Orlando: "Okay. Look, this needs to be quick. I just finished lunch and I need to start eating dinner in a few minutes."

    Carl: "No problem, I just wanted to let you know I'm preparing your contract demand."

    Orlando: "My what?"

    Carl: "Contract... you know that piece of paper you write your name on so I... er, I mean you can get paid?"

    Orlando: "Oh, yeah. So what's it say?"

    Carl: "It says you should be paid the same as all the other players on the team combined."

    Orlando: "Is that a lot?"

    Carl: "It should be!"

    Orlando: "Okay. Let me know when I should start playing again. Gotta go eat. Bye."


    Mike Martz/Kyle Turley

    Kyle: "Hello?"

    Mike: "Kyle! I'm glad I reached you."

    Kyle: "Who's this?"

    Mike: "Its me, Kyle. Coach Martz."

    Kyle: "Um... oh... um... there's nobody named Kyle here. You... uh... must have the wrong number."

    Mike: "Kyle, I know its you."

    Kyle: "Cccrkxxshhhh! What? I..cccrkxxxshhhh! Can't hear...cccrkxxxxshhhhh!...you I'm going through...ccrkxxxshhhhh... a tunnnel!"

    <click>

    Mike: "Kyle? Kyle?"


    Lovie Smith/Mrs. Smith

    Lovie: "Hello?"

    Mrs. Lovie: "Hi Honey! How did the scrimmage go?"

    Lovie: "Um... it... uh... What have I done!!!!! Why did I leave!?!"

    Mrs. Lovie: "It'll be okay, Dear."


    Charley Armey/????

    Charley: "Its me."

    ????: "The plan is working perfectly."

    Charley: "How many have you drawn in?"

    ????: "There's over 1,200 members now, and a good number of regular and casual posters."

    Charley: "Excellent. How long until the subliminal messages will start taking effect?"

    ????: "Not long. They should start sending us their credit card numbers within the next few weeks."

    Charley: "And they won't know they're doing it?"

    ????: "No. In their minds, they'll just be discussing Ram football on a message board."

    Charley: "Well done, De... wait, I think there's a tap this phone! I'll call you back later."


    Not sure what that last one was about
    .
    Of course, I've had my moments which I'd rather not remember. For example, here's a post from the start of this season. Could I have been more off target?

    You hear that?

    No? Good.

    What a glorious silence we are hearing now in the world of the Rams.

    No player holdouts...
    Nobody's facing criminal charges...
    No major injury questions (with the possible exception of Archuleta)...
    No QB controvery...

    Just think back 12 months ago. Orlando Pace was still unsigned, Leonard Little was facing a possible prison sentence, Kyle Turley was a question mark at a key position, and Marc Bulger was going into his first season as the unchallenged starter following a poor showing in the playoffs.

    That's not to say that the Rams do not have any question marks. Far from it. But they have the normal, expected, question marks (who will emerge at RG and SS, how will Marshall Faulk adjust to his new role, how will the rookies play). Not the disruptive type that the team has faced in recent years past.

    So, unlike in Seattle - where Shaun Alexander and Darrell Jackson threaten holdouts, or Arizona - where Josh McCown is waiting for Kurt Warner's first slip, or San Francisco - where PR nightmares are actually a welcome distraction from the team's lack of talent... its quiet in St. Louis.

    Enjoy the silence
    .
    Then again, there have been times I've been right on target!

    The Barron Situation is a Nonsense Magnet Sometimes, I wonder why I even bother reading the opinons of fans and sportwriters.

    Take the Alex Barron situation. Yes, it would have been better if he had looked more prepared at mini-camp. Yes, it would have been better if he had signed before the start of training camp.

    But the conclusions that people are asserting based upon what has occurred are just plain nonsense.

    The latest one, which many fans and the great Blarney Miklasz have uttered, is "he won't be ready to contribute until 2006."

    Are you kidding me? What if Barron had missed mini-camp due to a death in the family, and then missed the first two weeks of training camp due to some minor injury. Are you telling me that people would now be saying that Barron has no chance of contributing in 2005? Please.

    If Barron can't contribute this year, it won't be because he missed two weeks of training camp - it will be because he's simply not capable (and nobody, not even Mike Martz and Alex Barron, know if he is capable at this point).

    The other great "nonsense" argument is - "it will be a big adjustment moving to RT." First of all, Barron played quite a bit of RT at FSU. Second of all, in most cases, lining up at RT means that you are usually not facing the best pass rusher on the other team. Finally, the RT is more likely to get help from a TE than the LT.

    Again, this stuff is all nonsense. Barron will get into some games in the preseason, and we'll all have a better idea of whether his talent (which is undeniable) will override his lack of experience and underdeveloped technique.

    My bet is that it will, and that he'll be starting by week 5 or 6. But I am just guessing - just like everyone else!
    Anyhow, its been a great run of 4,000 posts. Thanks to all the great Ram fans and Clan members who have read, responded, argued, debated, ridiculed and praised the thoughts I've posted here!

    Here's to the next 4,000 posts!!!



    Last edited by AvengerRam; -11-28-2005 at 01:57 PM.


  2. #2
    theodus69's Avatar
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Clap Clap Clap Clap. Take a bow . And I have had fun reading your posts. And would say you are probably the most creative of this bunch. To be a Lawyer and to post 4000 is quite an accomplishment. I think Nick is the only one ahead of you and he just has a neglected girlfriendLOL . just kidding Nick. I'm coming up on a thousand and it has taken me ..... well, a long time!
    I stopped going to the dentist.......I got tired of the cavity searches!

  3. #3
    UtterBlitz's Avatar
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Props to you AvengerRam....even if you are blowing your own horn. The place would never be the same without the off the wall polls and creative posts that you bring to the Clan.

    4000 posts....wow....and that is not 4000 little one liner posts either....pretty impressive

    I do feel sorry for Nick's neglected girlfriend. Nick seems to live here.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  4. #4
    thoey's Avatar
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Congrats AR.
    This space for rent...

  5. #5
    MOM's Avatar
    MOM
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Looking forward to your next 4,000!
    [SIGPIC]http://www.stickershoppe.com/mm5/graphics/00000001/MLRPANCmini.jpg[/SIGPIC]This is for Randy! GO BRM!

  6. #6
    RamTime Guest

    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Avenger you big lug you. Now I know I have not been around much lately however you know I could never ever miss something as big as your 4000th post right? Just agree.
    On the Adarian/Avenger comedic point you brought up, I will admit that you are every bit as funny as Adarian however it seems like you have to work much harder at it then does Adarian. And I mean that in a good Christian way. LOL

    Congrats on 4000

  7. #7
    adarian_too's Avatar
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by RamTime
    On the Adarian/Avenger comedic point you brought up, I will admit that you are every bit as funny as Adarian however it seems like you have to work much harder at it then does Adarian. And I mean that in a good Christian way. LOL
    Oh, that did it. Every bit? Me and him in the same breath? Only a good rinse with clorox will cleanse my sight and wash that sentence from my eyes ...

    I seem to recall campaigning for controversy and humor just got in the way.

  8. #8
    AvengerRam's Avatar
    AvengerRam is offline Moderator Emeritus
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    I may, as Ramtime put it, work harder at it, but the ironic thing is, as funny as adarian may be, he lacks good humor about some things.

  9. #9
    adarian_too's Avatar
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by AvengerRam
    I may, as Ramtime put it, work harder at it, but the ironic thing is, as funny as adarian may be, he lacks good humor about some things.

    "Ah, what would I do without my foil?" he asked rhetorically.

  10. #10
    AvengerRam's Avatar
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Use Saran Wrap instead?

  11. #11
    adarian_too's Avatar
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    I just don't get it.
    I don't want to get it.
    I will never get it.

  12. #12
    AvengerRam's Avatar
    AvengerRam is offline Moderator Emeritus
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    You see, Saran Wrap is a good substitute for tin foil, so, without your foil you would use Saran Wrap.

    That is, unless you are making one of your hats, adarian, in which case tin foil is essential.

  13. #13
    STLRAMSFAN Guest

    Smile Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Congrats AR on your 4,000th you do bring life to the Clan.

  14. #14
    AvengerRam's Avatar
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Nothing wrong with a little shameless self-promotion every 1,000 posts or so.

  15. #15
    jkramsfan's Avatar
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    Re: AvengerRam's 4,000th Post Extravaganza!!!!

    Congrats Av On #4000.great Job

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