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Thread: Bernie Bytes: Rams soil the house of Warner & Faulk

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    Bernie Bytes: Rams soil the house of Warner & Faulk

    BY BERNIE MIKLASZ bjmiklasz@post-dispatch.com

    As I sat there watching this gadawful gob of offense congeal on the Edward Jones Dome carpet, I wondered about Marshall Faulk and Kurt Warner. They were in the stadium, working the game for the NFL Network, witnessing he ***** whipsaw the helpless Rams 35-11.

    The leading stars of the “Greatest Show on Turf” were back in their old house, seeing the place empty out, hearing the fans boo. Isaac Bruce and Torry Holt were in the big room, too. These legendary Rams saw the 2013 Rams defile what used to be the fastest, most exciting, high-scoring track in the NFL.

    This had to be as upsetting as someone breaking into a museum and vandalizing the pieces of art. Marshall and Kurt sat on their broadcast set and watched their house get trashed. Torry and Isaac could do nothing to stop it ... but I'm thinking that Warner, Faulk, Bruce and Holt could have suited up and scored more points than the Rams did on this grim Thursday.

    Faulk, Warner, Bruce and Holt were undoubtedly frustrated by what went down here Thursday night, and communicated their displeasure with their on-air commentary. But how sad is this, for these great old Rams to come home to the exact spot where they created such joy and thrills, and be subjected to another slow, crawling, lurch to the latest failure.

    This was a Thursday evening of unmerciful futility. The Rams have an offense that can’t run it, can’t block it, can’t throw it, can’t catch it. Coordinator Brian Schottenheimer’s play calls are predictable and utterly devoid of creativity.

    At this point, the Brian Schottenheimer offense makes his father Marty’s old boring offense look like something inspired by a bad acid trip, all crazy and psychedelic. Compared to this, the Marty Schottenheimer’s offense was the Mike Martz offense.

    (I know what Warner and Faulk and the others were thinking: as someone suggested on Twitter, they were probably feeling grateful they didn’t have Schottenheimer for an offensive coordinator.)

    Even though the ***** were missing two of the NFL’s best defensive players — Aldon Smith and Patrick Willis — the Rams could do nothing, not until they scored a late so-what TD after San Francisco had this one stowed for the trip home.

    The Rams finished with 188 yards offense. Bradford was sacked five times, which made it 11 sacks in the last five days. The Rams were out-rushed by the ‘Niners on the ground, 219 yards to 18.

    The Rams’ running game is so nonexistent, at this point I’d settle for two yards and a few particles of dust ... I don’t need three yards and a cloud of dust.

    Near the end of the game, the Rams’ offense came onto the field for the final time, a thoroughly defeated team, running on empty emotionally. And instead of trying to fight back, they took a knee to run out the clock in an obvious gesture of surrender.

    Sadly, this was probably the Rams’ best play of the game.

    It was the same new Rams.

    Same new Rams?

    Yes ... every time there’s a coaching-regime change, we’re led to believe that things will be different from now on. Talent will be procured, and developed, and it will grow into something special. The new Rams will get it done ... except that we’re now onto the third version of the new Rams.

    And if you can tell me the difference between the Scott Linehan Rams, the Steve Spagnuolo Rams, and the Jeff Fisher Rams, then send me an e-mail and explain. Because I’m not seeing it. These new Rams look an awful like the other new Rams, which makes them the same old Rams.

    A tease is followed by more depression. Linehan’s 8-8 record in his first season (2006) soon disintegrated into something unwatchable. Spagnuolo went 7-9 in 2010, then it all collapsed.

    Last year Fisher shaped the Rams up and gave them some punch in his encouraging 7-8-1 debut season, and unless things change soon, this season is about to jump the tracks, and land on the hissing, smoldering wreckage from Rams seasons past.

    Over the past two games, in the demolitions by Dallas and San Francisco, the Rams have been outscored 69-18. In the last three games, they’ve been outscored 55-6 in the first half. I could go on; you get the point.

    The Rams and the ***** each came into this game embarrassed by recent losses. But only the ‘Niners decided to do something about it. The Rams went into the fetal position again.

    This stinks. All of it. Offense, defense, special teams, coaching, and the play of quarterback Sam Bradford.

    Once upon a time, we all hoped that Bradford would become the Rams’ version of Peyton Manning — a franchise quarterback that would lead the franchise to greatness. Instead Bradford is looking more like Archie Manning, a talented young quarterback back in the day who took a horrific beating while valiantly trying to change the fortunes of the chronically hideous New Orleans Saints.

    I didn’t intend to make this all about the Rams offense. The defense is equally inept, getting gashed for easy breakout runs and giving receivers several acres of open space on passing attempts.

    I have no idea what the coaches are teaching. I can’t explain the strategy on either side of the ball. I don’t know how a Fisher team can be so feckless. I don’t understand how an offense can add speed and playmakers and get WORSE. I honestly do not understand any aspect of this.

    I’d like to just have the chance to chronicle some respectable football for two years in a row. Is that too much to ask? Apparently so.

    The Greatest Show on Earth moved out of here a long time ago, with a sequence of imposters moving in to take over, trying to recreate something that can never be duplicated. No one is asking them to be what those Rams were. But this performance the same new-old Rams are putting on doesn't even rise to the level of a bad Elvis impersonation.

    Where have all the legends gone?

    Other comments:

    • Fisher bolted from the post-game interview room after taking only two questions. That was about as weak an act as we saw from his football team. The lack of accountability apparently begins at the top.

    • Fisher’s big comment: “We’ll get it fixed.

    • Our reaction: “Show me.”

    • The Rams have 189 yards rushing in four games. They’re averaging 2.5 yards per carry. A quarter into the season, they are on pace to become the worst and least productive rushing offense in franchise history. The Rams are averaging 47.25 yards rushing per game. This franchise has been in existence for 76 seasons... and no Rams team has averaged fewer than 72.5 yards per game; that low mark came all the way back in 1938.

    • The Rams don’t block the run well. But this team doesn’t have anyone remotely close to establishing himself as a legitimate NFL running back. Not yet. Daryl Richardson, Benny Cunningham, Zac Stacy, Isaiah Pead ... pick a name out of a helmet. It doesn’t matter.

    • I betcha the geniuses who ripped Steven Jackson for so many years are feeling especially dumb right now.

    • Only one Fisher-coached NFL team has averaged fewer than 100 yards rushing per game; his 2005 Titans averaged 95.3.

    • Bradford looks bad. He had one of his worst games of his three-plus NFL seasons. The losing is getting to him.

    • With such a dormant offense the Rams could benefit from significant impact delivered by premium draft choices. But wide receiver Brian Quick and RB Pead are virtual non-factors. When a truly bad team with a grotesque offense uses the No. 33 overall pick on Quick, and the No. 50 overall pick on Pead, it better land some difference makers. But four games into their second seasons, Quick and Pead are just guys. Nothing more. It’s probably too soon to say that GM Les Snead had two swings and misses here — but it isn’t looking too good right now. Hell, Pead wasn’t even given a uniform for Thursday’s game (he was inactive) and Quick caught one pass for 12 yards.

    • I can’t wait for the regular season to start so we can see all the innovative, spectacular ways the Rams will use Tavon Austin as a playmaking machine in their revived and sensational offense... oh, wait.

    • Tim Walton = Larry Marmie. So far, anyway. I’ll be happy to take it back if the Rams’ defensive coordinator can put a “D” on the field capable of stopping the run or covering a good receiver.

    • The Rams defense has been powdered for 412 yards rushing in the last two games. The Rams pass defense needs assistance from the National Guard. In four games, opposing quarterbacks have completed 70 percent of their passes for 8.29 yards per attempt, 1,078 yards, seven TDs and one interception. The passer rating against the Walton-Fisher defense is 114.8.

    • Rams cornerback Cortland Finnegan is burnt pie.

    • More idiotic penalties on the special teams. Four games, still not fixed.

    • Like Coach Fisher, I am OUTTA here...

    Talk to you later...

    Thanks for reading....

    — Bernie
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    Re: Bernie Bytes: Rams soil the house of Warner & Faulk

    Quote Originally Posted by Curly Horns View Post
    BY BERNIE MIKLASZ bjmiklasz@post-dispatch.com

    As I sat there watching this gadawful gob of offense congeal on the Edward Jones Dome carpet, I wondered about Marshall Faulk and Kurt Warner. They were in the stadium, working the game for the NFL Network, witnessing he ***** whipsaw the helpless Rams 35-11.

    The leading stars of the “Greatest Show on Turf” were back in their old house, seeing the place empty out, hearing the fans boo. Isaac Bruce and Torry Holt were in the big room, too. These legendary Rams saw the 2013 Rams defile what used to be the fastest, most exciting, high-scoring track in the NFL.

    This had to be as upsetting as someone breaking into a museum and vandalizing the pieces of art. Marshall and Kurt sat on their broadcast set and watched their house get trashed. Torry and Isaac could do nothing to stop it ... but I'm thinking that Warner, Faulk, Bruce and Holt could have suited up and scored more points than the Rams did on this grim Thursday.

    Faulk, Warner, Bruce and Holt were undoubtedly frustrated by what went down here Thursday night, and communicated their displeasure with their on-air commentary. But how sad is this, for these great old Rams to come home to the exact spot where they created such joy and thrills, and be subjected to another slow, crawling, lurch to the latest failure.

    This was a Thursday evening of unmerciful futility. The Rams have an offense that can’t run it, can’t block it, can’t throw it, can’t catch it. Coordinator Brian Schottenheimer’s play calls are predictable and utterly devoid of creativity.

    At this point, the Brian Schottenheimer offense makes his father Marty’s old boring offense look like something inspired by a bad acid trip, all crazy and psychedelic. Compared to this, the Marty Schottenheimer’s offense was the Mike Martz offense.

    (I know what Warner and Faulk and the others were thinking: as someone suggested on Twitter, they were probably feeling grateful they didn’t have Schottenheimer for an offensive coordinator.)

    Even though the ***** were missing two of the NFL’s best defensive players — Aldon Smith and Patrick Willis — the Rams could do nothing, not until they scored a late so-what TD after San Francisco had this one stowed for the trip home.

    The Rams finished with 188 yards offense. Bradford was sacked five times, which made it 11 sacks in the last five days. The Rams were out-rushed by the ‘Niners on the ground, 219 yards to 18.

    The Rams’ running game is so nonexistent, at this point I’d settle for two yards and a few particles of dust ... I don’t need three yards and a cloud of dust.

    Near the end of the game, the Rams’ offense came onto the field for the final time, a thoroughly defeated team, running on empty emotionally. And instead of trying to fight back, they took a knee to run out the clock in an obvious gesture of surrender.

    Sadly, this was probably the Rams’ best play of the game.

    It was the same new Rams.

    Same new Rams?

    Yes ... every time there’s a coaching-regime change, we’re led to believe that things will be different from now on. Talent will be procured, and developed, and it will grow into something special. The new Rams will get it done ... except that we’re now onto the third version of the new Rams.

    And if you can tell me the difference between the Scott Linehan Rams, the Steve Spagnuolo Rams, and the Jeff Fisher Rams, then send me an e-mail and explain. Because I’m not seeing it. These new Rams look an awful like the other new Rams, which makes them the same old Rams.

    A tease is followed by more depression. Linehan’s 8-8 record in his first season (2006) soon disintegrated into something unwatchable. Spagnuolo went 7-9 in 2010, then it all collapsed.

    Last year Fisher shaped the Rams up and gave them some punch in his encouraging 7-8-1 debut season, and unless things change soon, this season is about to jump the tracks, and land on the hissing, smoldering wreckage from Rams seasons past.

    Over the past two games, in the demolitions by Dallas and San Francisco, the Rams have been outscored 69-18. In the last three games, they’ve been outscored 55-6 in the first half. I could go on; you get the point.

    The Rams and the ***** each came into this game embarrassed by recent losses. But only the ‘Niners decided to do something about it. The Rams went into the fetal position again.

    This stinks. All of it. Offense, defense, special teams, coaching, and the play of quarterback Sam Bradford.

    Once upon a time, we all hoped that Bradford would become the Rams’ version of Peyton Manning — a franchise quarterback that would lead the franchise to greatness. Instead Bradford is looking more like Archie Manning, a talented young quarterback back in the day who took a horrific beating while valiantly trying to change the fortunes of the chronically hideous New Orleans Saints.

    I didn’t intend to make this all about the Rams offense. The defense is equally inept, getting gashed for easy breakout runs and giving receivers several acres of open space on passing attempts.

    I have no idea what the coaches are teaching. I can’t explain the strategy on either side of the ball. I don’t know how a Fisher team can be so feckless. I don’t understand how an offense can add speed and playmakers and get WORSE. I honestly do not understand any aspect of this.

    I’d like to just have the chance to chronicle some respectable football for two years in a row. Is that too much to ask? Apparently so.

    The Greatest Show on Earth moved out of here a long time ago, with a sequence of imposters moving in to take over, trying to recreate something that can never be duplicated. No one is asking them to be what those Rams were. But this performance the same new-old Rams are putting on doesn't even rise to the level of a bad Elvis impersonation.

    Where have all the legends gone?

    Other comments:

    • Fisher bolted from the post-game interview room after taking only two questions. That was about as weak an act as we saw from his football team. The lack of accountability apparently begins at the top.

    • Fisher’s big comment: “We’ll get it fixed.

    • Our reaction: “Show me.”

    • The Rams have 189 yards rushing in four games. They’re averaging 2.5 yards per carry. A quarter into the season, they are on pace to become the worst and least productive rushing offense in franchise history. The Rams are averaging 47.25 yards rushing per game. This franchise has been in existence for 76 seasons... and no Rams team has averaged fewer than 72.5 yards per game; that low mark came all the way back in 1938.

    • The Rams don’t block the run well. But this team doesn’t have anyone remotely close to establishing himself as a legitimate NFL running back. Not yet. Daryl Richardson, Benny Cunningham, Zac Stacy, Isaiah Pead ... pick a name out of a helmet. It doesn’t matter.

    • I betcha the geniuses who ripped Steven Jackson for so many years are feeling especially dumb right now.

    • Only one Fisher-coached NFL team has averaged fewer than 100 yards rushing per game; his 2005 Titans averaged 95.3.

    • Bradford looks bad. He had one of his worst games of his three-plus NFL seasons. The losing is getting to him.

    • With such a dormant offense the Rams could benefit from significant impact delivered by premium draft choices. But wide receiver Brian Quick and RB Pead are virtual non-factors. When a truly bad team with a grotesque offense uses the No. 33 overall pick on Quick, and the No. 50 overall pick on Pead, it better land some difference makers. But four games into their second seasons, Quick and Pead are just guys. Nothing more. It’s probably too soon to say that GM Les Snead had two swings and misses here — but it isn’t looking too good right now. Hell, Pead wasn’t even given a uniform for Thursday’s game (he was inactive) and Quick caught one pass for 12 yards.

    • I can’t wait for the regular season to start so we can see all the innovative, spectacular ways the Rams will use Tavon Austin as a playmaking machine in their revived and sensational offense... oh, wait.

    • Tim Walton = Larry Marmie. So far, anyway. I’ll be happy to take it back if the Rams’ defensive coordinator can put a “D” on the field capable of stopping the run or covering a good receiver.

    • The Rams defense has been powdered for 412 yards rushing in the last two games. The Rams pass defense needs assistance from the National Guard. In four games, opposing quarterbacks have completed 70 percent of their passes for 8.29 yards per attempt, 1,078 yards, seven TDs and one interception. The passer rating against the Walton-Fisher defense is 114.8.

    • Rams cornerback Cortland Finnegan is burnt pie.

    • More idiotic penalties on the special teams. Four games, still not fixed.

    • Like Coach Fisher, I am OUTTA here...

    Talk to you later...

    Thanks for reading....

    — Bernie
    My sentiments exactly. BTW Id add Tavon Austin to that mix of non playmakers. As a product of glib, media infused fascination, we chose to lose a draft pick and move up to nab this guy that hasnt helped us at all. For someone that was traded up to get that we gave up something for, this guy has to step in and produce- no excuses.

    Think about it- we lost a rd 2 slot and could have had the pick of the #1WR litter in rd one where we were at as well as had a shot to as well as a top tier safety or O-lineman.
    Last edited by punahou; -09-27-2013 at 07:51 PM.

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    Re: Bernie Bytes: Rams soil the house of Warner & Faulk

    Very accurate and truthful article by Bernie. The truth hurts people.

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    Re: Bernie Bytes: Rams soil the house of Warner & Faulk

    Fisher bolted from the post-game interview room after taking only two questions. That was about as weak an act as we saw from his football team. The lack of accountability apparently begins at the top.
    Hey, it's best to forget about the loss, and how it happened as soon as possible. Silly questions from the media only draw out the process of pretending nothing bad happened against the whiners. Time to implement that short memory and move on.

    Fisher’s big comment: “We’ll get it fixed.
    Funny, but it seems we've been hearing that since the preseason. I'm glad he's going to get things fixed this time.

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