From the Job Posting Board at Rams Park

[AvengerRam]

HELP WANTED

Head Coach

Seeking candidates able to start January 2, 2006.
Qualifications:

• Ability to build strong defense.
• Demonstrated reluctance to use time outs and challenges early in games.
• Deferential attitude towards superiors.

Please submit applications c/o Samir Suleiman, Al-Bakar Business School for Mercenaries, Opa-Laka, Florida.

Defensive Coordinator
Seeking candidates able to start January 3, 2006.
Qualifications:

• No prior personal relationship with any Head Coach candidates.
• Nor prior relationship with the Arizona Cardinals.
• Proponents of the Marmie-style defense need not apply.

Defenders

Multiple openings in positions of DE, OLB, MLB, CB, SS and FS.
Qualifications:

• Demonstrated understanding of difference between "bumping" and "tackling."
• Must not be described as "undersized," "tweener," "project," "workout warrior," or "reach."
• Applicants who like making QBs and receivers cry preferred.

[general counsel]

When you suggest that the candidate should start jan 3, 2005, are you asking for a mulligan on this entire season, which i would support 100%.

ramming speed to all

general counsel

[AvengerRam]

D'oh!!!!

I meant 2006, of course.

[Rambos]

Thats is one of yout best to date, I would rather laugh then cry.

[theodus69]

Coach John Carrey D-coach Hillary Clinton( don't think she even likes men) And the Breakfast club! Nahhh We,d probably get the same results. Then again.....