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  1. #1
    adarian_too's Avatar
    adarian_too is offline Registered User
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    New Study discloses Ram Fans suffer from Stockholm Syndrome

    Warning: Plodding and cumbersome syntax ahead.

    It has troubled me some time why presumably sane and lucid fans continue to submit to sMartz' version of chinese water torture. With every failure, the drumbeat of excuses goes like this: Lovie should have blitzed in the last drive of the SB; KW is shell-shocked; Faulk is hesitant; the LBs are too small. Rather than lambasting Shaw and Armey for standing by and allowing sMartz to continue to drip tortureous inanities on fans' heads, fans gleefully profess the wisdom that it's the players fault and not sMartz'. Why is this Alicenian logic so prevalent?

    In an "unpublished study", the answer has been de-classified. Ram fans are suffering from the Stockholm Syndrome. For those not familar with the psychological condition, allow me to digress. In the summer of 1973, four hostages were taken in a botched bank robbery at Kreditbanken in Stockholm, Sweden. At the end of their captivity, six days later, they actively resisted rescue. They refused to testify against their captors, and raised money for their legal defense. The Stockholm Syndrome applies when a captive cannot escape, is isolated, and threatened with harm, while being shown token acts of kindness by the captor.

    Unwittingly, Ram fans are captive to the siren call of the horns. By itself that would be alluring. But in the process they have become mesmerized by the glow of the SB win. They have been seduced by the acclaim heaped on the mythological GSOT. They have become hypnotized by the long and quick scoring strike. sMartz, the captor, simultaneously has shown token acts of kindness every time he reaches into his hat and pulls out a successful play and with it buys fans' loyalties for one more time.

    It's been years since the Rams dominated the league with 40 yard plus scoring plays. But the fans still think it is possible if only KW, or MF, were replaced ... or Proehl or Conwell or Hodgins or Berger or Hakim or Horne or Hannifan or April. The fact is the glory will not return while sMartz is at the helm.

    And lest you think I say this in jest, consider this. Anyone who has had the occasion to speak in public knows this truism - there are only two ways to deliver a message: (1), you read from a script or notes; or (2), you present the message without the benefit of any cue cards. The difference between the two is that in the former the material controls you and in the latter you control the material. It is painfully obvious that sMartz needs the cue cards, he is not in control of his material. His head is buried in his sheet of plays searching for the next hypnotic move.

    If he truly were in control of his offense, I submit he wouldn't need to be reviewing his chart - he would know the plays by heart and know that a 3rd and 3 against a weak run/pass team would probably best be met by such and such a play. But NOo. Watch the camera when it's on him. He has his nose in his play chart and apparently the numbers and words are swimming on the page for him because he can't seem to find the right one given the adjustments the other team made. All the while the players look to the sideline hoping to see what he sees.

    Then when the ball is on the other side he stands impassively there smirking over the fact that he delegated those chores to someone else until the game was on the line and then he steps back in looking to pull another rabbit from the hat. If the rabbit doesn't materialize ... well, it must have been the players' fault. Oh, he'll admit his part in the story once in a while, but by now it is like the boy who cried wolf once too often.

    I'm sorry to say this ... but some fans' proclivity of keeping sMartz and his supporters unaccountable can only result in warping one's psyche in such a way that one comes to sympathize with one's tormenter. Otherwise how account for why so any are transfixed by sMartzian water torture? It's the Stockholm Syndrome I tell you. If you've got a better explanation, I'm prepared to suspend my state of denial if you are.
    Last edited by adarian_too; -09-28-2004 at 02:44 PM. Reason: Footnote/Endnote


  2. #2
    AvengerRam's Avatar
    AvengerRam is offline Moderator Emeritus
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    Re: New Study discloses Ram Fans suffer from Stockholm Syndrome

    You know, you may have something there, adarian.

  3. #3
    HUbison's Avatar
    HUbison is offline Superbowl MVP
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    Re: New Study discloses Ram Fans suffer from Stockholm Syndrome

    Just when you think you've heard it all, Adarian plays the Stockholm Syndrome card. I applaude you sir.
    "Before the gates of excellence the high gods have placed sweat; long is the road thereto and rough and steep at first; but when the heights are reached, then there is ease, though grievously hard in the winning." --- Hesiod

  4. #4
    RamTime Guest

    Re: New Study discloses Ram Fans suffer from Stockholm Syndrome

    HEY HEY HEY.... Layoff my man Martz.
    You just don't understand how his mind works. He's... He's.... God like you know! One day he will rule the world. You just wait! You... You.... Heathen

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