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  1. #1
    RamWraith's Avatar
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    Raven fans refuse to let colts leave town.......again

    BALTIMORE--Hours after their team’s stunning defeat at the hands of the Indianapolis Colts, fans of the Baltimore Ravens gathered in front of the Colts’ team bus and refused to let them leave the stadium parking lot. The last time the Colts left Baltimore, in 1984, they relocated to Indianapolis and never came back.

    Baltimore residents weren’t about to let that happen again.

    “We’re not letting them leave,” said one fan who was part of a human chain surrounding the Colts team bus. “We already made that mistake once and it’s not going to happen again. They just need to give up, get off the bus, and go into the locker room. If not, we can wait all night. We're very patient. A lot of us have been standing here since November.”

    The throng of fans began to form near the M & T Bank Stadium player’s parking lot prior to the game and grew larger as the game went on. By the time it was over, thousands of fans were standing at the entrance, blocking the way for the Colts team bus.

    Police officer Dennis Marks said the crowd was enthusiastic but peaceful.

    “There haven’t been any problems so far,” he told a reporter from WBAL-TV. “These folks just want to come out and make their voices heard. They’re proud Baltimoreans. Frankly, I have half a mind to join them. We all remember what the Irsay family did to us in 1984. But I’ve got to maintain a professional distance and let these folks be, especially since I’m pretty sure that guy in the ski jacket has a bomb strapped to his waist.”

    According to fans in attendance, their immediate aim was to get the Colts to exit the team bus and retreat to the locker room, where they would spend the week sleeping, eating, and preparing for the conference championship. The rest of the plan was unclear.

    “I’m sure the league and the people of Indianapolis will understand that we’re just reclaiming what’s rightfully ours,” said a 32-year-old Baltimore resident. “Why the hell can’t they just play as the Baltimore Colts next week and just see how it goes? If it goes good, maybe we can talk about making it permanent. If not, maybe we’ll come to some other sort of arrangement. That’s it. That’s the whole plan. Okay, so it’s not particularly well thought out. We’re an angry mob. What do you expect?”

    By midnight, the crowd still had nearly doubled in size. Police were on the scene but refused to disperse the crowd, calling it a “peaceful demonstration” designed to “raise awareness that the Colts weren’t going anywhere.”

    On the bus, the mood was somber.

    “Oh my God are we ever going to get out of here?” asked tight end Dallas Clark. “These people are nuts. We’re not going to move back to Baltimore. Why can’t they just be happy with the Ravens? They’re a good team. Maybe next year they’ll knock us out of the playoffs and get their revenge. Until then, just accept the fact that we won the game, and that the best quarterback on your team is named Kyle Boller. Seriously. Isn’t that ironic?”

    “We’ll get home eventually,” said a more relaxed Peyton Manning. “The fans here are just emotional. You can’t really blame them. It was pretty underhanded for this team to just up and leave in the middle of the night 23 years ago. Still, it turned out to be the best decision for us. I don’t want to live in Baltimore. Have you seen The Wire? That place is a hell on earth. It makes Indianapolis look livable.”

    It wasn’t until 6 o’clock the next morning that police began dispersing the crowd on orders from Mayor Martin O’Malley. The fans, exhausted but still feisty, cursed former Colts owner Bob Irsay as they shuffled out of the parking lot.

    “Go***mn Bob Irsay. What a p***k,” said 40 year-old Reggie Pagel, a former Colts season ticket holder. “I wish he were alive today to see all this. What a statement we made, standing out here all night and refusing to let them leave. I bet the Ravens were pretty impressed, too. They probably never realized how passionate and fiery we were. After this, I bet we’ll never lose another free agent again.”

    Late Monday night, however, witnesses reported seeing a fleet of 18-wheelers emblazoned with the Ravens logo exiting M & T Bank Stadium parking lot. Calls to the Ravens offices were not returned.


  2. #2
    laram0's Avatar
    laram0 is offline Superbowl MVP
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    Re: Raven fans refuse to let colts leave town.......again

    WOW! That's incredible. So are they Ravens fans or Colts fans? I'm confused.:x

  3. #3
    cowboyhater's Avatar
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    Re: Raven fans refuse to let colts leave town.......again

    Quote Originally Posted by laram0 View Post
    WOW! That's incredible. So are they Ravens fans or Colts fans? I'm confused.:x
    I think its a joke story (scrappleface, maybe?)

  4. #4
    RAMMAN68's Avatar
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    Re: Raven fans refuse to let colts leave town.......again

    I don’t want to live in Baltimore. Have you seen The Wire? That place is a hell on earth. It makes Indianapolis look livable.”
    I couldn't agree more Peyton; the place is a dump.
    JUST WIN ONE FOR THE FANS


    "HIT HARD, HIT FAST, AND HIT OFTEN"
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  5. #5
    RamOfDenmark is offline Registered User
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    Re: Raven fans refuse to let colts leave town.......again

    Awesome humor, got a good laugh out of me! I'm actually half believing it's true as I'm reading it LOL

    I guess the thing that stood out as unrealistic was the peaceful attitude from the police, in reality they'd probably assemble an army of officers in riot gear and lob some tear gas into the mob and then proceed to beat the ever living crap out of them, peaceful or not...Of course it may also be unrealistic to have such a crowd of protesters that are actually peaceful, protests like that often devolve into violence and random looting pretty fast, at least that's my experience.

  6. #6
    AlphaRam is offline Registered User
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    Re: Raven fans refuse to let colts leave town.......again

    Let's hope the Rams do not ever have to play a game against a team in LA, right?
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  7. #7
    Bruce=GOAT's Avatar
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    Re: Raven fans refuse to let colts leave town.......again

    Sounds like a sportspickle.com or thebrushback.com story. Hilarious stuff Wraith!

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