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Thread: My Webpage

  1. #16
    coy bacon is offline Registered User
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    Re: My Webpage

    On your Ram's page, you redundantly start each caption (save the last one) with "This is...."

    Change that. Spice it up a little, give your readers the benefit of being able to figure a few things out for themselves.

    EXAMPLE:
    Marshall Faulk breaks a long one against the Hawks. Though aging, the venerable, future Hall-of-Famer, Faulk remains a potent weapon for the Rams.

    Faulk's experience and savvy have made him the smartest player in the NFL by most standards, and he brings that to bear by assisting the coachs when he is on the sidelines.


    For the Jackson video, you have a sentence, "Is pure power." That's an incomplete sentence. Did you mean to write, "He's pure power?"


    For your movie page, you write, "I loved this movie." You don't need to say that, because your readers know you liked the movies because they made the cut for your page.


    You may also want to post a small blurb about yourself. Don't give out personal details, but say something about yourself, your life, your hobbies, important things you value, etc.

    If your teacher is going to judge your effort, make it as strong as you can.


    And, most importantly, don't write anything that you know, or suspect, your teacher dislikes or opposes. As you've pointed out, "slang". And fyi, when you get to college, the first rule to follow is, "say what the teacher wants you to say". College profs are the pits, the cream of corruption, and there ain't much you can do about it, so play the game by their rules. Otherwise they'll screw you over. (yes, I've been there, done that).


    You've done fine work and developed your skills. You are certainly off to a great start, keep building upon it.


  2. #17
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    Re: My Webpage

    coy, thats some good advice.

    I would also change the wording under each of the link pictures/buttons.

    I am not going to tell you what to put there, but you should change them


  3. #18
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    AvengerRam is offline Moderator Emeritus
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    Re: My Webpage

    Quote Originally Posted by coy bacon
    College profs are the pits, the cream of corruption, and there ain't much you can do about it, so play the game by their rules. Otherwise they'll screw you over. (yes, I've been there, done that).
    Easy there, Bluto. You don't want Dean Wermer to put you on Triple Secret Probation.

  4. #19
    coy bacon is offline Registered User
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    Re: My Webpage

    Av,
    I was just trying to tell RamsFan16 that being fat, drunk and stupid is no way to get through life.

  5. #20
    HUbison's Avatar
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    Re: My Webpage

    Quote Originally Posted by coy bacon
    Av,
    I was just trying to tell RamsFan16 that being fat, drunk and stupid is no way to get through life.
    I can think of a couple that have done well with it.
    Attached Images Attached Images   
    "Before the gates of excellence the high gods have placed sweat; long is the road thereto and rough and steep at first; but when the heights are reached, then there is ease, though grievously hard in the winning." --- Hesiod

  6. #21
    coy bacon is offline Registered User
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    Re: My Webpage

    I'd rather have the fat man on the left leading the country than the fat man on the right. Kennedy is the bigger joke. Only the people of MA would elect such a churl to office.

  7. #22
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    Re: My Webpage

    Heck, if Jimmy Kennedy ran in Massachusetts he'd probably be elected!

  8. #23
    coy bacon is offline Registered User
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    Re: My Webpage

    Av,
    Now that was funny!

  9. #24
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    Re: My Webpage

    Quote Originally Posted by Coy
    Only the people of MA would elect such a churl to office.
    Never heard this one. Coy, I gotta know.....what's a churl? If it describes Teddy, I know it ain't good, but what is it?
    "Before the gates of excellence the high gods have placed sweat; long is the road thereto and rough and steep at first; but when the heights are reached, then there is ease, though grievously hard in the winning." --- Hesiod

  10. #25
    coy bacon is offline Registered User
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    Re: My Webpage

    From dictionary.com

    n 1: a crude uncouth ill-bred person lacking culture or refinement [syn: peasant, barbarian, boor, Goth, tyke, tike] 2: a selfish person who is unwilling to give or spend [syn: niggard, skinflint, scrooge] 3: a bad-tempered person [syn: grouch, grump, crank, crosspatch]

  11. #26
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    Re: My Webpage

    Quote Originally Posted by coy bacon
    From dictionary.com

    n 1: a crude uncouth ill-bred person lacking culture or refinement [syn: peasant, barbarian, boor, Goth, tyke, tike] 2: a selfish person who is unwilling to give or spend [syn: niggard, skinflint, scrooge] 3: a bad-tempered person [syn: grouch, grump, crank, crosspatch]
    Yea, sounds like Teddy allright........that churl.
    "Before the gates of excellence the high gods have placed sweat; long is the road thereto and rough and steep at first; but when the heights are reached, then there is ease, though grievously hard in the winning." --- Hesiod

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