The Official Offseason Random Silly Whatever-a-Gogo Thread

**AvengerRam** · #1 (**permalink**) -12-05-2006

Tired of being told not to go off on tangents or to derail threads?

Bored with the post-draft/pre-camp portion of the offseason?

Just want to make a silly comment, or try out a new joke, or just say something random?

Well, here's your thread!

I'll start...

Ideas for New Celebrity Perfumes/Colognes

Stench - Kevin Federline

Spoiled - Paris Hilton

SciScentology - Tom Cruise

Why Bathe? - Kid Rock

Smokin! - Ricky Williams

Bitter Hatred - Anne Coulter

*RamsFan16* · #2 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

The Poopie List*
GHOST POOPIE: The kind where you feel the poopie come out, but there is no poopie in the toilet.

CLEAN POOPIE: The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.

WET POOPIE: The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won't ruin them with stains.

SECOND WAVE POOPIE: This happens when you're done poopie-ing and you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realize that you have to poopie some more.

POP-A VEIN-IN-YOUR-FOREHEAD POOPIE: The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.

LINCOLN LOG POOPIE: The kind of poopie that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush.

GASSY POOPIE: It's so noisy, that everyone within earshot is giggling.

DRINKER'S POOPIE: The kind of poopie you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.

CORN POOPIE: Self explanatory.

GEE-I-WISH-I-COULD-POOPIE POOPIE: The kind where you want to poopie but all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.

SPINAL TAP POOPIE: That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you'd swear it was leaving you sideways.

WET CHEEKS POOPIE (The Power Dump): The kind that comes out so fast, your butt cheeks get splashed with water.

THE DANGLING POOPIE: This poopie refuses to drop in the toilet even though you are done poopie-ing it. You just hope that a shake or two will cut it loose.

THE SURPRISE POOPIE: You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you are about to fart, but *oops* --- a poopie!

**RamsFanSam** · #3 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

Poopie?LOL

**Nick** · #4 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

No matter how hard he tries, Av will never create anything that tops the popularity of my Word Association thread.

**RamsFanSam** · #5 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick

No matter how hard he tries, Av will never create anything that tops the popularity of my Word Association thread.

Just how many times have I posted in there? If I remember right, only 3 or 4.

*r8rh8rmike* · #6 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick

No matter how hard he tries, Av will never create anything that tops the popularity of my Word Association thread.

Yep, as a certainty, this ranks right up there with death and taxes.LOL

*RamsFan4ever* · #7 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

hehehehehe poopie.....

(peter griftin)

**RamsFanSam** · #8 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

Well, if this is REALLY an open thread, I want to know something....

WHY CAN'T I FIND A "BUTT-KISSING SMILEY?"

*Milan* · #9 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

You haven't been looking hard enough.

*bigredman* · #10 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

Why don't Aardvarks get sick?

Answer: They're full of antibodies!
LOL

**RamWraith** · #11 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

What did the battery say to the potato chip??

I am Ever-Ready if you are Frit-o-lay!

LOL LOL

*RamsFan16* · #12 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

lmao thats a great one

-----------------------------------------------------
How to you sit 4 gay guys at a bar?

Flip a bartstool upside down

*bigredman* · #13 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

A rather butch looking woman with hairy armpits and a tank top comes into a bar, sits down, and raises her arm into the air yelling "who will buy me a drink?"

A drunk guy at a table across the room replies "I'll buy the ballerina a drink"

So the bartender pours her a drink, which she finishes in one swig. Again she raises her arm into the air yelling "who will buy me a drink?"

The same drunk guy says "I'll buy the ballerina a drink"

The bartender pours the woman another drink, then walks over to the drunk guy and asks "Why do you keep calling her a ballerina?"

The drunk guy swivels his head upward and replies; "Hell, any woman that can get her leg above her head like that, must be a ballerina!"
LOL LOL LOL

*Milan* · #14 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by bigredman

A rather butch looking woman with hairy armpits and a tank top comes into a bar, sits down, and raises her arm into the air yelling "who will buy me a drink?"

A drunk guy at a table across the room replies "I'll buy the ballerina a drink"

So the bartender pours her a drink, which she finishes in one swig. Again she raises her arm into the air yelling "who will buy me a drink?"

The same drunk guy says "I'll buy the ballerina a drink"

The bartender pours the woman another drink, then walks over to the drunk guy and asks "Why do you keep calling her a ballerina?"

The drunk guy swivels his head upward and replies; "Hell, any woman that can get her leg above her head like that, must be a ballerina!"
LOL LOL LOL

LOL

I can't think of a non-offensive joke at the moment.

*RamsFan16* · #15 (**permalink**) -13-05-2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by bigredman

A rather butch looking woman with hairy armpits and a tank top comes into a bar, sits down, and raises her arm into the air yelling "who will buy me a drink?"

A drunk guy at a table across the room replies "I'll buy the ballerina a drink"

So the bartender pours her a drink, which she finishes in one swig. Again she raises her arm into the air yelling "who will buy me a drink?"

The same drunk guy says "I'll buy the ballerina a drink"

The bartender pours the woman another drink, then walks over to the drunk guy and asks "Why do you keep calling her a ballerina?"

The drunk guy swivels his head upward and replies; "Hell, any woman that can get her leg above her head like that, must be a ballerina!"
LOL LOL LOL

Dude. Your mean. I WAS hungry. And now thats just growse. If I starve to death tonight its your fault