Philly Game

[bigredman]

Just to let the rest of you in on the plans, AlphaRam, his wife PA_gal_in_OK, and I are going to the game in Philly on Sept. 7th, then we are doing a road trip to St. Louis for the BASH and game against the Giants on Sept 14th. Those sirens you hear Friday afternoon in St. Louis are not an escort for some VIP, but us being chased by cops from four different states!

[AlphaRam]

If we only get chased by cops, that will be a relief. More than likely, we will be leading a convoy of ill-will. First, there will be a group of disheartened Egal fans that will be sore over the loss that receive and the insult to injury of BRM raising his kilt like he is the star of Braveheart. Next, Randy will raise the ire of the folks living in Wheeling, WV when he writes grafitti about hillbillies on the restroom wall of a Sunoco station. The HazMat team of the Dayton, OH fire department begin pursuit after Randy leaves the results of the triple Tex-Mex he had at lunch in a Wendy's near the interstate. We will be detoured down into KY as the state of Indiana will set-up road blocks as word is radioed ahead of our journey. On the way out of Ohio, Randy tries to make his own radio station (WKRAP) in Cincinnati as loyalists to Pete Rose give chase. As we pass over the Ohio river into Kentucky, residents of inflamed as Randy inappropriately touches a prize mare at a predominant horse breeding farm. Other residents of the state grow angry as Randy smuggles books into their state. We catch I-64 and still pass into the lower part of Indiana with a brief stop in Santa Claus. Randy wets on Santa's lap but that isn't urine that forces the jolly old man to jump up with his lap feeling like a tongue with 127 habanaro peppers on it. The good folk of Santa Claus form a lynch mob and the National Guard is called out. Fortunately, the Egal fans give up pursuit after they run out of batteries to throw. As we get away, wipes on a number of souvenier Santa dolls and throws them at our pursuers. We sprint into Illinois where Randy decides to stomp out some crop circles in the cornfields. You haven't lived until you have been chased by a fleet of John Deere combines!. Unknown to us, Randy has infuriated the Mohawk Indian tribe and they are hunting us like a fat man after a Ho-Ho. We finally race across the Mississippi River into St Louis when Randy decides to vomit. We're driving 70 and he pops open the back hatch on the van. He hurls with great velocity - blinding an entire team of Clydesdales, thereby snarling traffic behind us. This turns out to be a good thing for us as we finally ditch the combines, the 27 semis, 34 police cars, 3 Amish buggies, a herd of jersey milk cows, a swarm of locusts, a pack of wild dogs, the ACLU senior legal team, an M1a1 tank, and the shadow cast of the Colombus, OH Rocky Horror Picture Show.