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Joan Rivers

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  • Joan Rivers

    Anybody remember that Geico commercial where she says she can't feel her face? Well, right now, I can't feel MY face....LOL

    Comfortably numb is what I am!!!!!!!!!!
    sigpicThis is for Randy! GO BRM!

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  • laram0
    Paula Abdul (American Idol)
    by laram0
    Because of her quirky behavior many rumors have been started about Abdul.

    Her response is that she has never been drunk or done any recreational drugs.

    She is signed on with American Idol (Simon Cowell) through 2008.

    What is it with her then? Very strange individual.
    -02-14-2007, 05:32 AM
  • MOM
    The Potato Heads-- More Humor
    by MOM

    Well, Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other. Finally they
    got married and had a little sweet potato they called "Yam." Of course,
    they wanted the best for Yam. When it was time, they told her about the
    facts of life.

    They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't
    get accidentally mashed and get a bad name for herself like "Hot Potato"
    and end up with a bunch of Tater Tots. Yam said not to worry, no Spud
    would get her into the sack and make a rotten potato out of her!

    But on the other hand, she wouldn't stay home and become a Couch Potato
    either. She would get plenty of exercise so as not to be skinny like her
    Shoestring cousins.

    When she went off to Europe, Mr. and Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch out
    for the hard boiled guys from Ireland. And the greasy guys from France
    called the French Fries.

    And, when she went out West, to watch out for the Indians so she wouldn't
    get scalloped. Yam said she would stay on the straight and narrow and
    wouldn't associate with those high-class Yukon Golds or the ones from the
    other side of the tracks who advertise their trade on all the trucks that
    say, "Frito Lay."

    Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U. (that's Potato University) so
    when she graduated she'd really be in the chips. But in spite of all
    they did for her, one day Yam came home and announced
    she was going to marry Tom Brokaw.

    Tom Brokaw! Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset. They told Yam she
    couldn't possibly marry Tom Brokaw because he's


    Are you ready for this?.............................

    Are you sure? ............................

    OK! Here it is! ...............................

    -05-27-2005, 11:05 PM
  • UtterBlitz
    Two new conspiracy theories
    by UtterBlitz
    1. Theory #1. My sister was taken over by an alien. I called her a couple days ago and got a run down of the last few seconds in the Duke game. She is watching basketball now???? and she even sounds like she understands it. Weird.

    2. Theory #2 is from the alien sister. She thinks that Jake Delhomme got paid to throw the Seattle game. She thinks that he was throwing the ball to the Seattle players on purpose.

    What am I suppose to do with her? She is talking crazy.
    -01-25-2006, 09:48 PM
  • mxbrian
    by mxbrian
    Lest we forget what is truly unique about this team. Here is part of it...

    In a supermarket, Kurtis the stock boy, was busily
    working when a new voice came over the intercom
    asking for a carry-out at check register 4.

    Kurtis was almost finished, and wanted to get some
    fresh air, and decided to answer the call. As he
    approached the check-out stand a distant smile
    caught his eye, the new check-out girl was beautiful.
    She was an older woman (maybe 26, and he was
    only 22) and he fell in love.

    Later that day, after his shift was over, he waited
    by the punch clock to find out her name. She came
    into the break room, smiled softly at him and
    took her time card and punched out, then left. He
    looked at her card and saw her name was Brenda.

    Next day, he waited outside as she left the
    supermarket, and offered her a ride home. He
    looked harmless enough, and she accepted. When
    he dropped her off, he asked if maybe he could see
    her again, outside of work. She simply said it
    wasn't possible. He pressed and she explained
    she had two children and she couldn't afford a
    baby-sitter, so he offered to pay for the baby-sitter.
    Reluctantly she accepted his offer for a date the
    following Saturday.

    That Saturday night he arrived at her door only
    to have her tell him that she was unable to go
    with him. The baby-sitter had called and canceled.
    To which Kurtis simply said, "Well, let's take
    the kids with us."

    She tried to explain that taking the children
    was not an option, but again not taking no for
    an answer, he pressed. Finally Brenda, brought
    him inside to meet her children. She had an older
    daughter who was just cute as a bug, Kurtis thought,
    then Brenda brought out her son in a wheelchair.
    He was born a paraplegic with down syndrome.
    Kurtis asked Brenda, "I still don't understand why
    can't the kids come with us?"

    Brenda was amazed. Most men would run
    away from a woman with two kids, especially if
    one had disabilities, just like her first husband and
    the father of her children had done.

    That evening Kurtis and Brenda loaded up
    the kids, went to dinner and the movies. When her
    son needed anything Kurtis took care of him.

    When he needed to use the rest room, he
    picked him up out of his chair, took him, and
    brought him back. The kids loved Kurtis. At the
    end of the evening, Brenda knew this was the man
    she was going to marry and spend the rest of her
    life with. A year later, they were married and Kurtis
    adopted both of her children and since then...
    -02-04-2002, 08:19 AM
  • RamWraith
    Bernie: Chip in No Hurry to Sell
    by RamWraith
    Chip Rosenbloom (and his sister Lucia) are in no hurry to sell.

    I can see them owning the team for the next 5-10 years.



    The Rams aren't moving anywhere.

    In fact she took steps to ENSURE that they're staying here.



    She battled really hard. I could never divulge all that I knew out of respect to Chip and the family.... but frankly, doctors were amazed that she lived this long. I was told, point-blank, about two months ago that her passing could occur at any time; it was hour to hour. And yet, she would not succumb. She fought like hell to stay alive. This was a woman who really loved life, and the adventure of it all.

    I spoke to John Shaw. He's crushed. He knew this was inevitable, but he's as sad as could be.



    Let me tell you something, and the fans and media in LA who despised her can laugh all they want: I found her to be nothing like she was portrayed to be. In other words, she was the opposite of what I was told she was like when she moved the team here. I spent a lot of time with her. She was kind and generous with people. She did a lot of things behind the scenes to help people, things no one knew about. Was she eccentric and colorful and all of that? Absolutely. But really a delight to be around. Never a snob, never discourteous. Late? Yes. Always running late. But that was part of her charm. Somehow -- and I mean this is an affectionate way -- she will be late to her own memorial service.

    -01-19-2008, 07:32 AM